Wishcraft: How To Get What You Really Want, by Barbara Sher and Annie Gottlieb
I'm reading the original, not the 30th Anniversary edition. I found it at, guess where, the thrift store. Some really good finds there lately.
When you become aware of your own uniqueness, that's when you really begin to cherish and respect yourself- and to respect others! If you met people on the basis of their style, you would respect each one instinctively, and they would respect you. If we're not in competition with each other- if we're not threatened by our differences or busy trying to rank them- then our differences become resources. I'm not like you, and I don't want to be like you, because then I wouldn't have anyone around who could tell me anything I didn't know, show me anything I couldn't see. I'd only have me. I want you too, because you're different.(p. 39)
[F]antasy comes before strategy. (p. 53)
We're supposed to be able to pull in our belts, put off our pleasures, bear our disappointments, and face our fears without a squeak of pain or protest.
Hemingway called that kind of behavior "grace under pressure." I happen to consider it mildly psychotic. (p. 94)
That's what I call pathological individualism. I don't mean the marvelous individuality that makes each of us unique. I mean the cultural disease of extreme "self-reliance" that has cut us off from the most potent resource we have for achieving our goals: each other. The best ideas, the ones that really work magic, are the ones that draw on the knowledge, skills, and contacts of other people. (p. 113)
If your children look into your eyes and see delight, they've got a good world. If you're so tired and angry you can't enjoy them, what they're going to feel is, "I don't care about my Christmas present or my lunch. Why don't you ever smile?' (p.181)
Real listening, pg. 101
*in progress*
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